Two hours ago my daughter was to return home from college. It is now 11:30 p.m.
Imagine the shock we had when we got a call and she said, “The signs for Richmond have disappeared” and after she told us what mile marker they had just driven by, their location was close to Winchester. The driver had not seen the I-64 exit. We are going to rendevous somewhere here in the eastern part of the state, but who knows when that will be. Thus, I am at the computer cleaning out old files. I came across something I had saved from the Internet of church bulletin bloopers — classic examples of what happens when rules of composition are not followed. I was laughing so hard that my family had to come back to the home office to see if I had maybe, just possibly, finally “lost it.” I hope you enjoy these as much as I did.
=>Ladies, don’t forget the rummage sale. It’s a chance to get rid of those things not worth keeping around the house. Bring your husbands.
=>The peacemaking meeting scheduled for today has been canceled due to a conflict.
=>Remember in prayer the many who are sick of our community.
=>Don’t let worry kill you off – let the Church help.
=>Miss Charlene Mason sang “I will not pass this way again,” giving obvious pleasure to the congregation.
=>Next Thursday there will be tryouts for the choir. They need all the help they can get.
=>The Rector will preach his farewell message after which the choir will sing: “Break Forth Into Joy.”
=>Irving Benson and Jessie Carter were married on October 24 in the church. So ends a friendship that began in their school days.
=>At the evening service tonight, the sermon topic will be “What Is Hell?” Come early and listen to our choir practice.
=>Eight new choir robes are currently needed due to the addition of several new members and to the deterioration of some older ones.
=>Please place your donation in the envelope along with the deceased person you want remembered.
=>The church will host an evening of fine dining, super entertainment and gracious hostility.
=>Potluck supper Sunday at 5:00 PM – prayer and medication to follow.
=>The pastor would appreciate it if the ladies of the congregation would lend him their electric girdles for the pancake breakfast next Sunday.
=>Low Self Esteem Support Group will meet Thursday at 7 PM. Please use the back door.
=>The eighth-graders will be presenting Shakespeare’s Hamlet in the Church basement Friday at 7 PM. The congregation is invited to attend this tragedy.
=>Weight Watchers will meet at 7 PM at the First Presbyterian Church. Please use large double door at the side entrance.